Look, I'm one of the first people to say that we coddle our children a bit too much, particularly in exposing them to the reality of death, disease, heartache, etc. But, violence is one of those things that needs to be controlled when it comes to young children. Sparing, brawling, etc in real life are fine--they teach you that when you hurt someone it HURTS YOU. But, a video game where you shoot to kill people, not monsters but PEOPLE, is something that does warp your mind a bit, especially as a child who hasn't come to fully comprehend that every person who he shoots is a person just like him.
Not wanting to be left out is a huge part of conforming. You don't want to be left out, so you adopt the values and wishes of the people around you. I just really feel that helping a child do and become like his peers when its something like a violent game that he couldn't even buy on his own because he is too young is about on par with helping to buy your 16-year-old daughter alcohol so she can fit in better with her peers who thinking that partying at frat houses and getting very drunk is a good way to pass weekends and vacations.
And if he was the one helping to pressure his peers to conform, then it would be even more important to get him to see an alternative, because he could help influence an entire group of male children to stop holding those games on such a pedastal.
We both know I'm a gamer, and that I grew up with brothers who I wrestled with on practically a daily basis, so I understand wanting to play certain games and having violent tendencies...but I just don't think that a child who only knows the virtual version of violence should be allowed to play a violent game. If you want to play a game where people beat each other up, then you should spend some time actually sparring with someone and realizing how much it really HURTS to fight. Otherwise, I don't know how they're going to make that leap of empathy of "the person I shoot, kill, punch, etc feels pain, like I feel pain" until it's much too late, if at all.
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Date: 2010-12-10 08:54 pm (UTC)Not wanting to be left out is a huge part of conforming. You don't want to be left out, so you adopt the values and wishes of the people around you. I just really feel that helping a child do and become like his peers when its something like a violent game that he couldn't even buy on his own because he is too young is about on par with helping to buy your 16-year-old daughter alcohol so she can fit in better with her peers who thinking that partying at frat houses and getting very drunk is a good way to pass weekends and vacations.
And if he was the one helping to pressure his peers to conform, then it would be even more important to get him to see an alternative, because he could help influence an entire group of male children to stop holding those games on such a pedastal.
We both know I'm a gamer, and that I grew up with brothers who I wrestled with on practically a daily basis, so I understand wanting to play certain games and having violent tendencies...but I just don't think that a child who only knows the virtual version of violence should be allowed to play a violent game. If you want to play a game where people beat each other up, then you should spend some time actually sparring with someone and realizing how much it really HURTS to fight. Otherwise, I don't know how they're going to make that leap of empathy of "the person I shoot, kill, punch, etc feels pain, like I feel pain" until it's much too late, if at all.